On the lam from life
I was a nomad before it was hip
I used to joke that I moved so often, my friends thought I was in the witness protection program. The more uncomfortable life became, the more I was the arrow frantically shot by my Aries Moon. Simultaneously or alternatively escaping and seeking, sometimes consciously, sometimes not.
I escaped the constant phone calls (we only had land lines in the 1980s) from creditors and the IRS at my childhood home by moving out when I was 18.
In the Cascade Mountains and the Sierra Nevadas, I ran ultramarathons, seeking physical exhaustion to match my emotions, and to escape my husband.
I sought better jobs, better weather, better schools for my kids, moving them around Washington and California.
I escaped the city, ridden with anxiety at the end of the pandemic, and sought a yard for my puppy.
My astrology is such that it points me to home, family, and ancestry through healing trauma and finding spirituality. I have tried to escape even this, to no avail.
Over the last two years, since I made sobriety stick and began to awaken to my psychic abilities, I repeatedly saw visions of me tending a medicinal herb garden in my back yard, making medicines, and teaching others how to care for themselves and their loved ones in collaboration with plants. Every remotely psychic person I spent time with felt compelled to pass along strikingly similar messages from Spirit along the lines of “Tell her it’s time to get her hands in the dirt”.
Last year, I answered those persistent nudges to get my hands dirty, to learn the plants of my yard, my neighborhood, those growing on the beaches and trails near my home. I enrolled in herbalism school, hungrily completing 1200 hours of coursework in 6 months. I spent many happy hours with my shovel in the garden. I collected red clover tops and rose hips in my pockets while walking my dog. I made tinctures and salves for family and friends.
Late last year, I started getting to know the inside of my home, too.
I joined a Feng Shui group and started to understand what I already felt - that my home had an energy of its own, and I could foster a helpful relationship with the inherent structure of my home and the things, people, plants, and pet in it.
Having spent years on the lam from life, I have finally healed enough to begin to love the place where I sleep. After years of mandatory travel and self-bribery travel while I worked in corporate pharma, I am now content to be a homebody.
Then last week, I received not only a nudge, but four synchronicities in a row focused on making a solo retreat.
Once it became clear that I had to do this, and do it soon, I inquired in meditation,
Why?
Because you are ready now. You are no longer seeking anything.
This response landed squarely in my gut as a fact. With a solid refuge in my home and myself, I will be able to retreat in a manner that honors the practice. I booked the last 4 days of January at a Benedictine monastery. I have absolutely no agenda other than to be present.
So I will be at a quiet monastery in the woods of Washington state this week. In the meantime, here are the weekly messages and invitations for reflections and practices for paid subscribers (free subscribers, you can see the cards and haiku here).
First, an advertisement of sorts!
A client texted me last week in reference to what I predicted regarding her progressed Moon moving into the sign of Aries. See below regarding my batting average!
Weekly Oracle Card Pull
If you gave last week’s spread some space in your life, I would be interested to hear how it went in the comments
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Card 1. Clarity on last week: The Hunter (#27 of Mystical Shaman Pocket Oracle by Villoldo, Baron-Reid, and Lobos).
This card speaks to discernment. Given the sh*t show Tr*mp is making of the US government, more than ever, we are asked to be discretionary with our attention. Maybe it is not the best use of our energy to stop and watch every dumpster fire, you know?
Instead, consider how best to remain informed and use our energy in a way that contributes to our legacy as human beings.
When I made my 2025 vision board back in ye olden days of early January, I was inspired to clip and paste numerous pictures of forests, and to cut out the words “forest” and “nature”, not having a conscious reason for this theme.
The message I am starting to understand from this is to zoom out, to see the forest for the trees, and this is the insight I take about last week from this card.
Also, when I was searching for a monastery to retreat to, the one closest to me had images of trees very much like the ones I clipped and pasted onto my vision board.
Card 2. Help bridging last week to this week: Queen of the Earth (from Animal Guides Tarot, Radleigh Valentine, Dan Craig).
The subtitle for the card reads: Thoughtful, Caring, Creative, Ingenious.
The message is fairly adamant that we will be “…given advice that’s both practical and creative, and it should be followed precisely.”
Personally, I am wondering if I am in for some advice from my Spirit team while I am on my solo retreat this week, and am a little scared about having to follow it precisely. I mean, it could be anything!
Aside from that, what I am pulling from this card is that we can make our own luck.
We are also asked to keep our loved ones close this week.
We are asked to mentor, to protect those who are still learning the ropes, and to teach them the skills to navigate the material world according to natural and not manmade rules.
Card 3. Something to look for this week: For the Wind The Blows Our Sails (#26 from The Dream Weaver’s Oracle, Colette Baron-Reid, Joel Nakamura).
The essential meaning from the guidebook feels accurate to me: “ …forward movement, coming out of a slow period, a time for action”
Many people feel they have lugged the heavy energy of 2024 into this year with them, making it feel slow indeed. The desire to act has been building, but maybe it hasn’t felt like you had all the necessary resources, information, or energy.
This week, be aware of changes in your own energy. Follow your intuition about who it feels vibey to be around, or go spend time where you feel inspired (or can at least people watch), like an art gallery or a public park.
If you haven’t felt right about planning out 2025, maybe this week you will.
I wish you health, joy, peace, and love this week.
Love,
Maria Luz