Got caught up on your journal entries this morning. It brings me back but I also feel like you were light years ahead of where I am now in your first few months sober. Up until recently, if I had a nightmare about past trauma I’d be down for weeks, spiraling, making it worse. I let them control me. Now I embrace the nightmares as a sign from my guides that I need to cleanse, that I’m on the brink of a breakdown, that something is out of alignment. I use them as an early warning mechanism.
As for the sugar, well, I have wrangled in all the other substances except for this one. For over 3 years I’ve just been using the excuse that at least it’s not alcohol and carbs be damned. Recovering from eating disorders and a fucked society, I’m triggered at the thought of showing any dietary restraint due to conflicting motives. I want to start approaching it in a way that releasing this hold may help open me up spiritually or at least have a better grasp on my body and mind. We’ll see. Sugar is my last hangup, my final distraction.
I am with you on the nightmares. It is so vulnerable and scary, and it has taken me a long time to go to bed feeling like I will be okay even if I have one, or worse, the sleep paralysis type. I still leave the hall light on most nights, though. Of course, Spirit's way of pushing me to get over my fear was to give me a dog who doesn't like sleeping with me or even in my room, and my son a graveyard shift job!
As for sugar, funny, I was just responding to a post about this on my sobriety FB group (BFB). I think a lot of my concern in early sobriety was diet culture and not trusting myself as opposed to any imbalance in nutrition or concern like that.
I really love baking and the ritual of a nightly treat, so I do still indulge regularly!
I used to do protection prayers before bed that I got from Mat Auryn’s Psychic Witch book. I would also leave lime wedges all over my room (tip from @jessicalynnmediumship on Instagram). I wanted to protect my sleep at all costs and avoid the nightmares. And it helped a lot! Nothing ever happened. I was winning at sleep boundaries! 😄
But I ultimately stopped because I wanted to open myself up to spirits, even when sleeping. These tools were blocking me from all dreams and I do think dream space is a great place to get guidance and signs and blessings from loved ones. I didn’t want to miss out on all of that. But I do have these tricks in my back pocket for days when I’m feeling extra raw and vulnerable. Let me know if you want me to send you my old pre-bedtime ritual. But it sounds like you have it all under control. (And I too sleep with nightlights and hall lights on, etc. lol.)
Yes! I totally agree about the dreamspace being so helpful for many reasons, and not closing it off. I do feel more confident that I can handle anything weird that comes up, even if that means calling in angels, guides, or my dad.
Got caught up on your journal entries this morning. It brings me back but I also feel like you were light years ahead of where I am now in your first few months sober. Up until recently, if I had a nightmare about past trauma I’d be down for weeks, spiraling, making it worse. I let them control me. Now I embrace the nightmares as a sign from my guides that I need to cleanse, that I’m on the brink of a breakdown, that something is out of alignment. I use them as an early warning mechanism.
As for the sugar, well, I have wrangled in all the other substances except for this one. For over 3 years I’ve just been using the excuse that at least it’s not alcohol and carbs be damned. Recovering from eating disorders and a fucked society, I’m triggered at the thought of showing any dietary restraint due to conflicting motives. I want to start approaching it in a way that releasing this hold may help open me up spiritually or at least have a better grasp on my body and mind. We’ll see. Sugar is my last hangup, my final distraction.
I am with you on the nightmares. It is so vulnerable and scary, and it has taken me a long time to go to bed feeling like I will be okay even if I have one, or worse, the sleep paralysis type. I still leave the hall light on most nights, though. Of course, Spirit's way of pushing me to get over my fear was to give me a dog who doesn't like sleeping with me or even in my room, and my son a graveyard shift job!
As for sugar, funny, I was just responding to a post about this on my sobriety FB group (BFB). I think a lot of my concern in early sobriety was diet culture and not trusting myself as opposed to any imbalance in nutrition or concern like that.
I really love baking and the ritual of a nightly treat, so I do still indulge regularly!
I used to do protection prayers before bed that I got from Mat Auryn’s Psychic Witch book. I would also leave lime wedges all over my room (tip from @jessicalynnmediumship on Instagram). I wanted to protect my sleep at all costs and avoid the nightmares. And it helped a lot! Nothing ever happened. I was winning at sleep boundaries! 😄
But I ultimately stopped because I wanted to open myself up to spirits, even when sleeping. These tools were blocking me from all dreams and I do think dream space is a great place to get guidance and signs and blessings from loved ones. I didn’t want to miss out on all of that. But I do have these tricks in my back pocket for days when I’m feeling extra raw and vulnerable. Let me know if you want me to send you my old pre-bedtime ritual. But it sounds like you have it all under control. (And I too sleep with nightlights and hall lights on, etc. lol.)
Yes! I totally agree about the dreamspace being so helpful for many reasons, and not closing it off. I do feel more confident that I can handle anything weird that comes up, even if that means calling in angels, guides, or my dad.
It’s great you realized you’re worthy because you are!
Thank you Barb 💗